PARKINSON'S LAW:  Work expands to fill the time available for its completion.
 PARKINSON'S LAW, MODIFIED: The junk you have will expand to fill the available space.
 THE PETER PRINCIPLE: In every hierarchy, each employee tends to rise to his level of incompetence.
 CHEOPS' LAW: Nothing ever gets built on schedule or within budget.
 MURPHY'S LAW: If something can go wrong, it will.

 WEILER'S LAW: Nothing is impossible for the man who does not have to do it himself.
 FINAGLE'S LAW: Once a job is fouled up, anything done to improve it makes it worse.
 RUDIN'S LAW: In a crisis that forces a choice to be made among alternative courses of action, most people will choose the worst one possible.
 UNNAMED LAW: If it happens, it must be possible.
 CLARKE'S THIRD LAW: Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishible from magic.
 GUMPERSON'S LAW: The outcome of a given desired probability will be inverse to the degree of desirability.
 UNNAMED LAW: After a salary raise, you will have less money at the end of the  month than you had before.
 UNAMED LAW 2: The more a recruit knows about a given subject, the better chance he has of being assigned to something else.
 CUTLER WEBSTER'S LAW: There are two sides to every argument unless a man is personally involved, in which case there is only one.
 ALBRECHT'S LAW: Social innovations tend to the level of minimum tolerable well being.
 PATRICKS'S THEOREM: If the experiment works, you must be using the wrong equipment.
 SKINNER'S CONSTANT: (also Fynnegan's Finagling Factor) That quantity which, when multiplied by, divided by, added to, or subtracted from the answer you got, gives the answer you should have gotton.
 HORNER'S FIVE THUMB POSTULATE: Experience varies directly with the equipment ruined.
 FLAOLE'S LAW OF THE PERVERSITY OF INANIMATE OBJECTS: Any inanimate object, regardless of its composition or configuration, may be expected to perform at any time - in a totally unexpected manner for reasons that are either entirely obscure or also completely mysterious.
 ALLEN'S AXIOM: When all else fails, read the instructions.
 THE SPARE PARTS PRINCIPLE: The accessability during recovery of small parts which fall from the workbench, varies directly with the size of the part, and inversely with its importance to the completion of the work underway.
 THE COMPENSATION COROLLARY: The experiment must be considered a success if  no more than 50% of the observed measurements must be discarded to obtain a correspondence with theory.
 THE ORDERING PRINCIPLE: Those supplies necessary for yesterday's experiment must be ordered by no later than noon tomorrow.
 THE ULTIMATE PRINCIPLE: By definition, when you are investigating the unknown - you do not know what you will find.
 THE FUTILITY FACTOR: No experiment is ever a complete failure - it can always serve as a bad example.